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Butch v. Tommy - Week Two

Butch would like to be the first to hand out the pink thank-you slips to UCLA head coach Rick Neuheisel. They are two-sided slips so that Butch can express his gratitude from both sides of his mouth. First, there is the gratitude expressed by Butch and all his Pac-10 brethren for shutting up the SEC - for at least a week – about being the dominant force in the universe in college football or some of their similar, signature blather. When a projected second-division Pac-10 team takes down an "over"-rated opponent from the strongest, baddest football conference in the land, well, the initial response is something like "hahahahahahahaha"…followed closely by "ha!" Tommy's boys of Troy usually handle the conference duties of taking down SEC opponents a peg or four, so it was good to see another conference team get the dirty deed done dirt cheap. The other expression of gratitude is one of mock sincerity – because Butch found it to be quite ironic that Tommy's mortal enemies – the Powders, as he likes to call 'em – were the team to save his butt from being tied with Butch after the first week. In short – his beloved Bruins gave him the Week One lead – all hail the Bruins, right Tommy? Tommy?
Tommy: So Tommy sends a shout out to the Powders for giving him a one game lead. Gotta love Phat Phil and his unwillingness to take any risks. To update the current picture, the Skirted One has a slight lead on Mr. Furry, and is looking to extend it while his Trojans take the week off to prepare for the good people who voted for Jerry Springer to come to town.
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Butch: Tommy will gladly accept one-game-lead gifts from his Bruin buddies but Butch is not exactly torn up on the inside that Tommy has a tiny lead after the first week – especially since it came at the expense of the SEC [and Tommy is with Butch on that count] – so maybe it can be called all good last week, except that maybe the Cougars could have covered.
BYU (-6.5) at Washington
Tommy: This one looks like a gimme. Butch's buddies got murdered by the Ducks, and BYU's QB Max Hall will play despite a vicious hit in their opener that knocked him out of the game. Tommy's not so sure. Last season, a terrible Poochie squad made short work of Boise State at home, nearly beat an unbeaten Hawai'i team on the road, and defeated Pat Hill's Bulldogs two years ago. Ah, they're still coached by Willingham though. What's under the feathered helmet tells me to hedge bets and declare the Cougars big winners against the spread...by half a point. Reduced Alcoholic Beer For Everyone...If You Buy A Membership-25, Wonder How Locker Is Enjoying His Decision To Play In Seattle-18.
Butch: This game stinks to high heaven …a topic on which the combatants seem to have conflicting viewpoints, or at least with some of the procedural issues involved. But never mind that, Butch distinctly remembers eating a big wad of something – and it didn't taste good - last year with that Boise State match-up and there is no way he is going to fall into that same trap this year. Butch takes BYU to win but the Hussies to cover.
Oregon State at Penn State (-16.5)
Tommy: The Beavs have been absolutely phenomenal on the road out of conference...when it comes to getting humiliated on national TV. This time only a regional audience will see them get smoked in the Valley of Joy. Congratulations to the OSU athletic department for mitigating the damage this time. Will Paterno Sprint To The Bathroom?-45, Still Gotta Play Hawai'i, SC, and Utah Next-18.
Butch: You have complete agreement from Butch on this one, Tommy. The Rodents are 0-5 straight up and 1-4 ATS in their road openers the last five years and that speaks so many volumes that even Old Man Paterno can hear it. They need to schedule the way ASU does in the first few weeks of the year. Butch takes the Nitts to win and cover.
Utah State at Oregon (-35.5)
Tommy: More than five touchdowns is a lot for our feathered friends, but come on, the Aggies just lost to UNLV. This is going to be ugly...and fast. The Land of Many QBs-49, What The Hell's An Aggie?-10.
Butch: Yeah – way too many for a freshman and a JC quarterback running the offense to cover. Either they make mistakes to keep it down on their own or Bellotti plays the nice card and tries to keep it under 70. Butch takes the Nikes to win but the Aggies [they're marbles, Tommy] to cover.
California (-13) at Wazzu
Tommy: Tommy thinks this is too many points on the road for a team that is as inconsistent on the road as the Bears. But 82 yards passing? From a Pac-10 team not named Stanford? WOW! Color me unimpressed. The Cougs are still getting the kinks out, and right about now some fans might be missing Alex Brink. Still, Cal has failed to cover on the road in eight of their last 11. Normally, the Cougs would be getting hyped for their big rivalry game with the Spuds right about now, but they'll regroup and give Tedford's guys a game. Dirty Hippies-28, Under Construction-20.
Butch: In recent years – more specifically, the last couple - double digit spreads in conference openers in Pullman usually do not cotton too well with the locals. ASU and USC can attest to that as Wazzu covered both those games. Butch sees it like Tommy, the Fighting Tedfords should win but the Cougars should play better and cover.
Stanford at Arizona State (-14)
Tommy: The Cardinal had a nice feel good moment with a win over the Bark Rats, and Tommy's not super impressed with the 94 rushing yards that the Scum Devils piled up against mighty nationally ranked Northern Arizona. But the Trees' blitzing ways are right up ASU's alley, as they have a gambler at quarterback who can hurt teams with the deep ball. 3-0 Till Georgia-45, Back To Reality-24.
Butch: Yep, that brief one-game party is over for the Trees. Will the fans ask for their refunds after this game even though it was not played at home? Butch takes the Sun Devilinas to win and cover.
Toledo at Arizona (-22)
Tommy: Looks like we got a Lubbock West thing going. The angry coach and his minions blasted out 70 points against Butchy's hapless rivals. The Rockets are coming off back to back losing seasons and have never been road warriors out of conference. Tommy suspects another easy cover for the Kitties. They Scored 70 and Stoops Is Still Mad-50, I Miss The Earth So Much, I Miss My Wife-12.
Butch: Now that the Idaho massacre is over and Stoops mentality out in the open for everyone to see, Butch sees him acting sportsmanlike again and tagging 60 or so on the big MAC attack. Butch takes Arizona to win and cover.
Tommy
Last Week: 5-2
Butch
Last Week: 3-4
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